My wife recently started working for a multinational company, a job which she informed me would require international travel. Well, the time came for her first trip. It was hastily put together at the last minute, giving her less than 24 hours notice. She forwarded the flight information to my e-mail so I would know. Well, at the last minute, she claimed her bosses changed the flight to have her leave some 12 hours before her original departure time (the evening before her original flight). I thought it a bit odd, but went along with it anyway even though she never e-mailed me the updated flight information. Long story short, the time of her original flight, I called the airline and told them I was concerned my wife may have missed her flight and they told me she was indeed on the flight. In fact, there wasn't even a flight at the time she claimed she would be traveling. She even called me, claiming to be in another country while she was right here in our hometown at the airport, no less than 20 miles from our home. I confronted her about this lie and she admitted to it. Her reasoning was that she wanted to attend a party with her co-workers and stay at a female co-worker's home, which would make things easier for them since they were traveling together in the morning. She claimed she did not tell me because I would be jealous and paranoid (which I am prone to). I understand that, but why lie about it? Why would my wife create such a huge, complicated, involved lie in order to stay in town an extra night? I know what I think, but I want to know what you think. Thanks!
Here are some reasons I suspect an affair.
- I have been struggling with ED, which is frustrating to both of us.
- In the past she was so upset about it that she told me, "I will cheat on you."
- She rarely wears her wedding ring, citing that it tends to slide off her finger in yoga class. She says she takes it off before class and forgets to put it back on.
- She stays awake in front of her laptop a few hours after me nearly every night, claiming to be working.
- She's very secretive and protective with her cell phone and laptop.
- She never leaves work on time.
- After an argument months ago, she changed her MySpace profile to "divorced" and never changed it back.
- The night of our last argument, she claimed she was going to be out with a girlfriend. I called the girlfriend at midnight and she said she had not heard from my wife that day. My wife later claimed she was at a bar, having a beer by herself. Oddly, no charges were ever made to her debit card.

That sounds extremely fishy. Even if the story she gave you is true that she would and could make up a lie that elaborate should be very troubling. If this is something she does often you might want to hire someone to look into it for you.
I would also recommend marriage counseling, she needs to learn the importance of honesty in the relationship and if it really is that your are overly jealous or paranoid you need to learn to trust. Unfortunately both your jealousy and paranoia and her lying are going to feed of one another and continue to purpetuate the problem if you don't fix it soon. Good luck!